Sunday, February 17, 2008

So that was Madrid…

Five days, four nights, lots of fun. Madrid is as cool as I’d imagined, and I’m certainly glad I took the time to visit. Hannah and I had a really good break, seeing lots of sights (the Plazas are beautiful!), drinking lots and lots of cafĂ© con leche (desnatada, por favor), and also being exceedingly lazy!

It was just the break I needed, and it was a totally different to the pace of life here. Here I have a fairly hectic lifestyle (heheh, usually….tonight I’m writing this curled up in front of a movie sipping tea!) in a very sleepy rural environment….conversely in Madrid I had a much more relaxed time of things, but in this crazy urban sprawl. You know how they say New York is the city that never sleeps? Well Madrid would have to be the city that never shuts up! I had heard about it’s noisiness beforehand, but it really is extreme. 3 a.m. and you’ve got people shouting, rubbish being collected, whistles being blown, and car horns (always with the car horns!).

It was also a headtrip being in a country where I spoke none of the language – previous visits have been to the US or Canada, or France or Germany, all of which speak languages I know / have studied / grew up among. Spanish, however, was pretty much an unknown quantity! I was fairly good at picking it up though, and the Madrilenos were so tolerant of my amateurish efforts! Hannah and I even managed a whole musical in Spanish – guess who came back with the soundtrack to Jesuchristo Superstar in her luggage?

It was really good fun, and now I just have to decide which city to do next… Rome, Dublin, Berlin and New York are all near the top of the list… I might do Dublin next term – but don’t let me kiss the Blarney stone, please – can you imagine a more talkative me?

Cxx

Sunday, February 10, 2008

Half-term, baby!

It's here, with quite striking soon-ness! I am typing this super quickly before I zoom over to Hannah's ready for an early flight to Madrid tomorrow morning. I am very, very excited - I've wanted to go to Spain for ages, and the chance to catch up with one of my girlies is awesome too.

Thanks for your patience with the previous post...I was a little tired and sad and was definitely having one of those days! Plus the whole situation with the boy had got me down and I'd a had a wee downward spiral, but on reflection I reaaaaallly think I'm better off out of there. Why get hung up on someone who doesn't care about me? He's either rude or a coward or even more of a ditz than I am... and I don't think I need that in my life, to be fair. In all three cases, that would be history repeating! And life is too short and too sweet to waste time on behaviours that make you miserable, surely?

Today it is a springlike and sunny day, and I've had a great nights sleep. And I'm going on holiday. And there are things in my life innumerable that make me smile, fill me with hope, or that I can look forward to.

It a nutshell? It's all good.

How are you all doing today?

Love, as always,
Cxx

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

My little world.

Is great, most of the time. I’m so lucky and so blessed in so many ways, and I’d run out of space here if I tried to list all the wonderful people, wonderful things, and wonderful times I have in my life. I’ve also been through some dark and nasty places (including Aberdeen, bdmm kssh!), so I know how doubly blessed I am.

I’ve got friends who just make my heart sing, and people who make me giggle, and people who make me want to be a better person. I’ve got a safe warm home, and more things than I ever dreamed of when I was sharing a room with the sibs, wearing thrift shop clothes and never getting new things or nice things. I’ve had so many chances and opportunities, and I’ve been surprised time and again by the sheer niceness, beauty and awesomeness of this thing called life!

But.

Something’s up. Something’s….missing? It’s like I’m here and my life is grand, and I think I’m doing OK. But I’m not where I want to be. And I’m not sure how I get there. I feel a bit like a supporting actress rather than a main player, somehow. Is that mental?

I guess I’m getting to the point in my life where I’d like to feel I’m part of a home and a family of my own, if that makes any kind of sense? But I’m greedy, of course, I’d still want to have adventures and fun and friends who crack my stuff up. I have friends that have this in their lives, and on days like today I just want to sit down with them and ask them how they did it! It’s just a blue day I’m sure, brought on from too much work and a lot of pressure, but this theme is coming up every so often now….so I thought I‘d think aloud and see if I could make some more sense of it.

Maybe I’m missing a gene or something. I’m just feeling a bit lacking today. I want someone to come give me a hug and explain how to fix this…

I’m good, I’m OK, I’m tired. I love you all bundles and hope you are having a super day!

Cxx

Sunday, February 03, 2008

Sleepy Claire....

It has been a crazy couple of weeks. I've worked up a storm, gone on an actual date (which went well, then the stuff fizzled out. Which is a shame, but I'm being *such* a grown up about it), hit the gym, dropped another 3 pounds, auditioned for a reality show, had a Join Meet in Birmingham, and had some good times and good chats along the way.

I was going to do a longer post, but I may fall asleep at the keyboard...I spent last night asleep on a giant beanbag watching infomercials, and I have a parsnip in my purse. Claire needs to sleep before she deals with anything work or chore based. And as I'm going to the opera tonight, I feel a nap coming on...

More soon!

Cxx

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