Friday, July 19, 2013

Five Minute Friday: Belong

Five Minute Friday

Linking up with Lisa-Jo and Ann, on belonging.

Five minutes, just writing, words on the page.

Real, vital, full of the tang of 'truthiness', as my class might call it.

A blessing.


For the first quarter century of my life, I always felt like I didn't belong.  The RAF brat, always moving.  The black sheep of my lovely family, mum and dad one unit, my doorstep siblings the other.  Boarding school and the 24/7 game of thrones that can sometimes be.  Neither Scottish nor English, a mutt.  New houses, new faces, new schools.  

Always having to find a new space in the pecking order.  Sometimes top dog....sometimes bottom of the heap.  University for undergrad was more of the same - while I picked up some lifelong friends during that time it was also a rollercoaster of emotions and there were some dark times.  And always, always, I felt like I was walking on the ice of a lake before the thaw.  Supported....for now.

After university came a gap year, then PGCE, then work.  My confidence grew a little as the months passed by and I started to feel a little more secure.  A little more like I belonged.

And then the loneliness hit.

Working sixty-five plus hours a week, hundreds of miles from friends, family, loved ones.  Single like it was my job.  The first two years of teaching taught me so much about belonging, because at my most alone physically, I realised that I did belong.  I was loved and needed and heard, even when I went for days or weeks with no-one to hang out with or talk to beyond the school days.

Phone calls, letters, emails, blogging - through these media, the lonely little girl who felt like she never fit in learned, as a woman, that she had a place.  A voice.  Something to give.  Those four years in my little flat in the country ended up being the making of me - not only did my first job set me up beautifully for the career I adore, but the being-on-my-own so much taught me that true belonging isn't just about being surrounded by people (a big learning moment for this boarding school brat!).  It isn't about geography.  It isn't about a daily call, or a weekly letter, a monthly's about all of us in our little orbits, making sure we cross paths where we can.

And now, I truly feel like I belong.  My family and friends and Matthew are so great at helping me when I forget this, and this blesses me every day.  My life may be quirky, but it's mine.  And here, in my little quirky place, is where I belong.



  1. I'm a military wife and have often wondered how my kids would do in their quest for a place to belong. The moving around is hard sometimes for me and I'm an adult who chose this life. They didn't. I'm trying to instill a sense of home that travels with them where ever we are, but it isn't always easy.

    Glad to hear that, although it was hard-won, you've found a sense of belonging and stability.

  2. Hello Neighbor! I linked up after you at FMF. I enjoyed reading your writing today. Quirky is cool..I have a quirky little life myself and that is what makes it interesting. I like how you said belonging is about all of us being in our own little orbits crossing paths when we can. It creates a bigger picture of belonging in the world as a whole. Speaking of crossing paths- it was great crossing yours today :) ~ Rebekah at

  3. The more I read, the more I realize we have in common. I'm glad you are belonging in your comfy space now :)


Thank you for your comment - I do read them all but it may take me a little while (a couple of days) to respond during busy times. I love reading what you have to say!

Have a wonderful day!

Total Pageviews

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

Country Mouse Claire

Designed By:

Munchkin Land Designs



#100happydays #londonriots (in)courage *happy dance* 101 lbs 1990s music kick 2014 30 dot 32 in 32 40DOW 5 minutes 5 on Friday a good weep accountability Adam adventures advice for life afternoon tea Amber ambitions animals Anna anxiety ask me anything autumn babies badgers baking beauty BEDM beginnings being a grown up Beverley Big Move of 09 (TM) birthdays blessings bliss blog love bloggers blogging blogging on the tube book reviews books boys brave break Bruges brunch budgeting busy C25K Cameron Canada Cat catching up cats celebrations challenges changing charity checking in Chez children chillaxing Christmas Christmasplaylist Christy Claire gets cooking Clever Girls clothes coffee comedy computers confessions confidence. shyness confusion contemplation cooking Cornwall counting blessings Country Mouse in the City crafts crazy like a fox (or maybe a penguin?) creativity culture currents cuteness daddy dan and brigitte dancing Dannii Dave daydreaming DIY Doctor Who dreams drinking driving ducks easter Edinburgh Eileen Elly and Nick Emer Emily Emily C Emma emotion End of term energy engagement entertaining Erin events excitement exercise fail faith Fakemas family fashion fb fear feminism films Fingal fish Five Minute Friday five minutes Florence flux food football Forres friday favourites friends frugality Fry-cat fun fun and games funny geekery Geffen gifs gifts gigging giggles gilmore girls girldates giveaways Goldy goodbye gossip Gossip Boy growing growing up guest post halloween Hannah happiness happy Mondays happy snaps HBR health health kick 2011 Hebba help please Henry Holiday Hampers holidays home homemaking honesty hope HRH I heart Thursdays I Love Your Blog ill inspiration instagram internet into investing Jamanda James and Laura Jason Jean Jenga Jenn Jennisa JLL Jo Join me Joinees joy K. Kat and co Kate Boo katzen Kaz kindness kitchen kittehs language lately Laura learning Leela-cat Lent less than happy letters Leyton life life is good life overhaul link up linkiness lists Liverpool living well London loneliness looking after myself Lou love loveliness lows LTLM madness Madrid magic making peace Mattheiu May 6th maybe meal planning media meetup meme metaphor Midimus Minimus Miss Ash Mlle Wilson Mogan Monday Funday money moonwalk mornings motivation Mr H Mum W mummy music napping naps nature new starts not me Monday NYA Olympics online organisation Oscars our home our wedding out and about packing partying Payal PCtKOTG people I love Phase Eight Phil photos picnik Pictures that make me smile pinterest PJs planning plans poetry politics polyvore Poppet-cat popping in post prayer pretty things procrastinating project life pyjamas quiz quote quotes rain random random coolness RAoK RAoK365 reading relaxing reminiscing rest restaurants reviews Richard Riot Kitty Rory SAD sadness Sam saving school Scotland Sean self-image sharing Sheli shiny Shona shopping short and sweet show us your life shyness silence silliness simplicity singalong Siobhan Siobhan's Matthew SiVar skype sleep sleepover sleepy Slightly Less Big Move of '10 smile snow spam Spanner sparkpeople sponsored post spring spur of the moment squee SSP stationery Steeeeve stellan stream-of-consciousness stress stumbleupon style summer Sunday social sunshine sweetness Tara teaching tech teenage me thankfulness The Daddy the future the GPB the KOTG The List the niecelet the one hundred the past the present theatre thinking thinking out loud this week TIL tough love tracks of my years travel trimming truth tv twitter UBP ugly UK valentines vibes video Vienna visits Vixie vlog volunteering walking wants vs. needs weddings weekend WEG weight weight watchers Wilf wine winter wisdom wishes Wiwille women wordless Wednesday words words to live by work working out worries writing youtube


Designed by Munchkin Land Designs • Copyright 2013 • All Rights Reserved